Local Yokels

It's pretty sad when even the local news can't spell Phoenix properly.

Survey Says ...

It seems to me that if you're going to spell Phoenix phonetically, you'd start with an F, but that's just me.

Their prerogative

VH1 doesn't need permission, it makes its own decisions. Including the decision to forgo any kind of proofreading.

TGI ...T

At first glance, there's nothing wrong with this one. Except that this year, August 11th was a Tuesday. Friday was the 14th.

I'm assuming the game was on Friday the 14th, but I can't be sure.

I think they mean "cleavage"

They must. Because as far as I know, "cleavitch" is not a word.

Not for the "feint" of heart

Manticore's Moustache is a blog I check fairly often. It features odd and random pictures and videos. I like that sort of thing. I did not, however, like what I saw on one post:



I don't know how well that picture's going to show up, but in case you can't see it very well (curse you, screenshot!), I'll tell you what jumped out of the blog and choked me. The blog author says the woman in the video feints. F-e-i-n-t-s. To the best of my knowledge, to feint is to fake someone out. I'm pretty sure that the woman in the video fainted, f-a-i-n-t-e-d. Unless she was faking. In which case she feinted a faint.

Literacy

Today's bit of English lunacy was stolen from the Telegraph.

Currently appraising currency

I'm not sure how much money an adverb is worth. I thought about going to ask but I didn't have a dollar in "currently" to donate.

Finally, an excuse not to exercise

It's amazing how the reversal of two small words can completely change the meaning of a sentence. I'm certain, for instance, that 24 Hour Fitness meant to say that by bringing in the ad a person will get one week of free admission. Instead, they're saying that if you bring in the ad, you'll get a week without any fitness at all - seven whole days, free of fitness! Sounds like my kind of gym.

I'm sick 'n' tired of cutesy spelling

What on earth is wrong with the word 'and' or a simple ampersand? And what the h does 'n' mean? It's not in my OED.

Ironic packaging

This isn't strictly speaking a language issue, but the packaging was so ironic I had to share.

I'm sure the cutters are good for those tough-to-open packages (and for pruning rosebushes, by the looks of them) but how are you supposed to open the package to get them out?

More legal holiday problems

I'm not sure which bothers me more, the spelling or the fact that people are willing to pay five dollars for a chihuahua-sized Mrs. Claus hat.

I hope no one's expecting Tim Allen

I realize that a number of years ago there was a movie called "The Santa Clause." But you see, "clause" was a pun of sorts, what with him being Santa Claus and a clause being a distinct article in a formal document, and Tim Allen's character being forced into the role of Santa based on some magical contract ...
But the name is spelled c-l-a-u-s, not c-l-a-u-s-e. Nice try, East Valley Tribune. Thanks for playing, Dana Park. But I'm afraid you're both losers.

And I'm not even going to get into my issues with the random capitalization (Bring your own Camera!). One glaring error per day is my quota.

Marshmallow Crispy's ... what? Crispy's what?

Will someone please explain to me why it is that so many people use apostrophes to pluralize words these days? Last I checked, an apostrophe indicated possession. So what I want to know is, what is it that belongs to the marshmallow crispy?

Customer "Appreciation" Card

We "appreciate" our customers. Just like we appreciate a good bullet wound.

Will "Flirt" For Gifts

Look, I'll smile a little, I'll toss my hair, but honestly, I'm not going to put much of an effort into this. If you insist, I'll "flirt."

An introduction of sorts

I am something of a grammar snob. When I hear a person misuse the English language, a little part of me itches. When I see quotation marks where none are required, I roll my eyes. And when I see an apostrophe used to pluralize a word, my blood pressure rises.
I don't claim to be perfect. Many times in writing I find that I've erred in an embarrassing manner. But I correct myself. I check my spelling and grammar. I proofread.

I am a fan of such blogs as The "Blog" of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks. I've even submitted examples of poor usage. Alas, my submissions have never been published.

So I decided to start my own blog on the topic. And, I decided, I wasn't just going to single out quotation marks or apostrophes. I was going to nitpick at every mistake in English usage I found. I was going to appoint myself chief of the Language Police.

Here I am with blog number four on my Blogger account. Like my Domo blog, this one will be primarily photographic. And, dear readers, feel free to send me any criminal examples you may find, photographic or otherwise.

Do enjoy.