Currently appraising currency

I'm not sure how much money an adverb is worth. I thought about going to ask but I didn't have a dollar in "currently" to donate.

Finally, an excuse not to exercise

It's amazing how the reversal of two small words can completely change the meaning of a sentence. I'm certain, for instance, that 24 Hour Fitness meant to say that by bringing in the ad a person will get one week of free admission. Instead, they're saying that if you bring in the ad, you'll get a week without any fitness at all - seven whole days, free of fitness! Sounds like my kind of gym.

I'm sick 'n' tired of cutesy spelling

What on earth is wrong with the word 'and' or a simple ampersand? And what the h does 'n' mean? It's not in my OED.

Ironic packaging

This isn't strictly speaking a language issue, but the packaging was so ironic I had to share.

I'm sure the cutters are good for those tough-to-open packages (and for pruning rosebushes, by the looks of them) but how are you supposed to open the package to get them out?

More legal holiday problems

I'm not sure which bothers me more, the spelling or the fact that people are willing to pay five dollars for a chihuahua-sized Mrs. Claus hat.

I hope no one's expecting Tim Allen

I realize that a number of years ago there was a movie called "The Santa Clause." But you see, "clause" was a pun of sorts, what with him being Santa Claus and a clause being a distinct article in a formal document, and Tim Allen's character being forced into the role of Santa based on some magical contract ...
But the name is spelled c-l-a-u-s, not c-l-a-u-s-e. Nice try, East Valley Tribune. Thanks for playing, Dana Park. But I'm afraid you're both losers.

And I'm not even going to get into my issues with the random capitalization (Bring your own Camera!). One glaring error per day is my quota.

Marshmallow Crispy's ... what? Crispy's what?

Will someone please explain to me why it is that so many people use apostrophes to pluralize words these days? Last I checked, an apostrophe indicated possession. So what I want to know is, what is it that belongs to the marshmallow crispy?